Defining moment

Describe a defining moment or series of events that has affected your life this year.

Quite possibly the single most defining moment of 2010 for me was the one where I knew that my longstanding relationship was finally over. It cascaded into a series of events wherein I gained a clearer sense of who I am without a partner to lean on for support or to act as a mirror of who I expect myself to be. That series of events also led me to wrestle with which of the compromises I had made to maintain that relationship — which I valued tremendously — were good ones, made from integrity, and which were poor ones, made out of fear.

The whole experience turned out to be kind of a classic trial by fire for me, and one whose repercussions I doubt I’m entirely done with, but I’m enjoying feeling their reverberations less and less strongly.

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